post-NDE and surgery ...

[kossai]

not really about NDE in self , but some of events around NDE .

medical talk , medical neglect , some serious disgust and bullshit .

in mid 2023 , kossai end up in hospital for health complication , which surgeon refuse to operate on , in at least some part because nonverbal . so this obviously did not just go away , would continue to cause trouble for months after , and in early 2024 almost kill kossai . surgery become immediate necessity to save life - fortunately , not in hands of that original surgeon .

hospital then discharge within 24 hours , without even know whether or not bowels back online . like yeah , kind of gross , but need to make sure patient at least pass gas . absolutely irresponsible . have to bear bumpy , hour-long car ride with these fresh wounds just eager to split back open , and honestly kind of miracle that nothing did .

painkiller prescription only make everything feel worse . not only do painkillers not touch pain , but also make extremely dizzy and nauseous - so there was no pain relief kossai could get . and on top of that , bathroom break down - have to walk whole way across house to get to second bathroom , in extreme pain from fresh surgery , without any painkillers to relieve even slightly .

kossai think lots about how mental and emotional complications of NDE lead to trauma and subsequent kiss of madness , but honestly , physical complications of surgery did too . not only bear physical scars of surgery , but certain things never work quite right since then - and wonder how much of that is due to inadequate recovery .