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kossaiother adult alterhumans talk about difficulties in indulge and express alterhuman identity as , well , adult who need to work and move through society . teenage descriptions of how to embrace during school hours , or how to find places to hang out safely and signal to potential friends , still important but no longer resonate - in some part due to differences in school and work environments , as well as different obligations and freedoms or lack thereof .
but kossai have different perspective , as disabled and unable to work . have all of this " free time " to do anything that wish with , but have to fight against things like chronic pain , low energy , and weakness . usually easy measures of indulgence and expression can actually be quite hard - always love to sit outside or to get driven around , but ability to do even that depend on levels of pain and weakness . sometimes just have to settle for open window and wistful gaze .
also have to deal with medical systems and clinical eyes on more regular basis than most others - actually part of shower aide program , as unable to do that alone . in similar way to work environments , even small expression of alterhuman identity can be unsafe . in this case , would risk lose position in program if any of workers make choice to say not really disabled .
see , consensus of kossai is that many struggles this body deal with stem from nonhumanity , from faerie traits that stretch and squish to try and fit boxes of what human body should do . this is well and good for " private opinion " , but not exactly safe to express clinically . at best , might treat like also have schizophrenia on top of everything ... and that is very loose at best , given intense amounts of control at play with this diagnosis . at worst , would strip away all of help , under assumption of no real physical struggles at all .
this is why also push so hard that , no matter how unrealistic identity seem to others , need to have spaces to express this without constantly tag and make disclaimers , even if this put at odds with those who need to avoid triggers . already need to do that enough in private parts of life , to always medicalise experiences so others will decide whether or not to give help and respect . absolutely need breaks to just say thoughts and feelings as exist , not to filter through what others will find medically acceptable - otherwise , internal sense of personhood and/or reality can genuinely shatter and leave in far worse state .
as for general public expression ... honestly , already very used to dirty looks , on basis of visible disabilities and gender-sex variance . while kossai do not really have wearable gear aside from some game night accessories , in theory would not be much different from what experience now . people judgmental enough to give dirty looks in first place would continue to do so , and others generally would not . at worst , those less-judgmental people accept as " another cute quirk " to giggle about - at best , outrightly compliment and praise .
not really any good way to end this post , just ... in some ways struggle to relate to even other adult alterhumans about this subject . which is fair , everyone is different , but can still feel somewhat lonesome .
but kossai have different perspective , as disabled and unable to work . have all of this " free time " to do anything that wish with , but have to fight against things like chronic pain , low energy , and weakness . usually easy measures of indulgence and expression can actually be quite hard - always love to sit outside or to get driven around , but ability to do even that depend on levels of pain and weakness . sometimes just have to settle for open window and wistful gaze .
also have to deal with medical systems and clinical eyes on more regular basis than most others - actually part of shower aide program , as unable to do that alone . in similar way to work environments , even small expression of alterhuman identity can be unsafe . in this case , would risk lose position in program if any of workers make choice to say not really disabled .
see , consensus of kossai is that many struggles this body deal with stem from nonhumanity , from faerie traits that stretch and squish to try and fit boxes of what human body should do . this is well and good for " private opinion " , but not exactly safe to express clinically . at best , might treat like also have schizophrenia on top of everything ... and that is very loose at best , given intense amounts of control at play with this diagnosis . at worst , would strip away all of help , under assumption of no real physical struggles at all .
this is why also push so hard that , no matter how unrealistic identity seem to others , need to have spaces to express this without constantly tag and make disclaimers , even if this put at odds with those who need to avoid triggers . already need to do that enough in private parts of life , to always medicalise experiences so others will decide whether or not to give help and respect . absolutely need breaks to just say thoughts and feelings as exist , not to filter through what others will find medically acceptable - otherwise , internal sense of personhood and/or reality can genuinely shatter and leave in far worse state .
as for general public expression ... honestly , already very used to dirty looks , on basis of visible disabilities and gender-sex variance . while kossai do not really have wearable gear aside from some game night accessories , in theory would not be much different from what experience now . people judgmental enough to give dirty looks in first place would continue to do so , and others generally would not . at worst , those less-judgmental people accept as " another cute quirk " to giggle about - at best , outrightly compliment and praise .
not really any good way to end this post , just ... in some ways struggle to relate to even other adult alterhumans about this subject . which is fair , everyone is different , but can still feel somewhat lonesome .
Thoughts
Date: Feb. 28th, 2026 08:28 pm (UTC)That sucks. :(
>> sometimes just have to settle for open window and wistful gaze . <<
Might it be possible to maximize the view from the window(s)? Some folks have birdfeeders or native plants to attract wildlife. A perk of native species is that a lot of them are "throw and grow" requiring little or no care.
>> see , consensus of kossai is that many struggles this body deal with stem from nonhumanity <<
That happens to a fair number of nonhumans.
>> this is well and good for " private opinion " , but not exactly safe to express clinically . at best , might treat like also have schizophrenia on top of everything <<
Medics can be downright dangerous, and surprisingly delusional. Most won't interact with me, just an imaginary idealized human body in their heads. Since my body is far from their delusional ideal, this causes problems when it does things they consider unexpected or impossible.
>> need to have spaces to express this without constantly tag and make disclaimers <<
Everyone needs space to be themselves, without apologizing for it. This is harder for some than for others.
>> in some ways struggle to relate to even other adult alterhumans about this subject . which is fair , everyone is different , but can still feel somewhat lonesome .<<
My sympathies.