kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

crosspost from tumblr .original post )

dreamwidth preface : kossai tumblr audience is largely physical nonhumans , and supporters of physical nonhumans , who can safely navigate exposure to experiences that fall outside modern ideas of objective reality . this post in particular is about language that aim to not trigger unreality by way of question and deny experiences as personal truth .

these points can be useful in cases other than physical nonhumans , such as plural and religious aspects , but please be mindful of this main context if this might trigger .


kossai do not like to approach memories of other folks as false memories , unless that is how individuals personally explain , no matter how far these memories fall outside ideas of objective reality . have some thoughts on language and mindsets to actually put to use in respect .

 

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kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

late crosspost from tumblr .original post )

dreamwidth preface : debate whether or not to put this one here - did not write this to reignite discussions , just think important to put these thoughts together cohesively . peak of this discussion was very much frustration for kossai , as feel like people try to justify deliberately hurt friends , and could not explain thoughts very well through that . as well , just write another post which want to cross over here , and that one link to this one , so sort of unavoidable now .


one gripe that still have with discussion of unreality triggers and tags is that ... unreality trigger is not really one solid category . unreality trigger is not only something which contradict ideas of objective reality - this is just one potential kind of unreality trigger . but anything that can cause question and destabilisation of reality is , for all intents and purposes , unreality trigger .

everyone have different experiences , boundaries , and tolerances . to hear of witchcraft and gods might be unreality trigger for one , while denial of these is unreality trigger to another . pool toys could be unreality trigger to someone . so could minecraft . so on and so forth .

kossai have minor unreality triggers that can spiral if already in bad shape - prefer not to say what those triggers would be , internet safety and all , but these pretty silly and innocuous things to others . no one would consider these to contradict ideas of objective reality , but experiences which kossai go through contextualise these as destabilisers .

this is why many physical nonhumans push back against trigger tag experiences as unreality , whether consider experience delusion or not , even if that seem cruel . to reinforce that others consider experiences to be unreal and delusional , and that others do not feel comfortable or safe to hear about experiences , is in fact unreality trigger for these folks .

some folks characterise this as selfish refusal to care for others , when really not . to cross lines of what modern world consider objective reality can and will deeply hurt some , this is true . but everyone who peacefully live beyond those lines not cruel to say that ideas of objective reality and classification as delusion just as much of trigger .

unreality trigger is category as broad as PTSD trigger - these things both sets of mental processes and feelings , which can spur on by any triggers , even ones that contradict common perception of what triggers " should be " .

this is where kossai policy of unreality tags come from . not often come up here anyway - regardless , will tag thought experiments , works of art and fiction , or other posts that deliberately try to play with idea of what is real or not real . but will not tag personal discussions or experiences as unreality .

to draw line of whose experiences get to be reality , and whose experiences must be unreality to hide behind trigger tag , means to decide that only some triggers worth respect - which will hopefully agree , is pretty unfair .

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

crosspost from tumblr .

in terms of accessibility , specifically in how people write posts , want to remind everyone that not every difference is choice , and thus not able to change . 

differences which can not just change : 

  • dyslexia 
  • use of assistive technologies to type
  • not first language
  • word salad - as in symptom of things like mania , schizophrenia , this is not simple word for misinformation
  • brain injuries
  • in general , any " different from normal " grasp on language - syntaxes , grammars , word retrievals , traits beyond spelling

of course , yes , non-native speakers can learn more natural fluency with time , some dyslexic people can use autocorrect or dictation to lower letter mistakes , and so on .
but these situations can not just change upon request , and most will not just recover later . someone with brain injury in language centres can not just spontaneously regrow these to fix mistakes , for example . 

differences which can change :

  • intentionally misspell words to mimic baby speech , speech impediments , etc
  • use of different fonts
  • use of characters from different languages as fonts - often also disrespectful and great confusion to speakers of those languages
  • use of colours in text
  • character substitutions in general - such as 3 for E

muscle memory can make these things feel more natural , easy even . and yes , understand there can be great emotional comfort in some of these . but there is choice and ability to simply not use these - certainly doubt these show up in school or work projects .

would argue , if intend for post to serve as information which all should see , then please avoid such quirks . not even quirk text first and plain text after : people who need that plain text might simply skip post entirely due to inaccessibility of start , never to know there was plain text , and never to learn that information . 

but also , if struggle to read what someone write , please try to think about whether or not this is in choice . some people refuse to give plain text of quirks because that is " too much work " , and this is cruel attitude . but others do not have ability to change and to rephrase , and can have no answer other than " not possible , sorry " . 

[ this post is not invitation to compliment how anyone write . this is plea for basic decency and manners , not compliments . ]

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
sort of hard to talk about experiences with shower assistance because ... really is just , someone help with shower - not much detail to talk about and help people learn from . like , assistant will wash hair , will soap up , rinse off , everything that just normally do in shower .

would say real difference to talk about is just , different people have different approaches even in same sequence of events ?
some do just bare minimum if honest - basic shower done is better than none of course , and know this particular agency understaff and overwork , so do not really hold against anyone there ... but yeah , sometimes find not always best . others really try to make sure not just clean , but comfortable too - offer extra shampoo , offer time to sit under spray , and so on .

as well - some like to chat , some just stay quiet , some do little bit of both . never really know who will come until actually happen though , so that can frustrate sometimes if just need quiet time but chatty assistant come around . 

there is also extreme gender imbalance in this particular agency , and think true in general with these agencies .
there is this sort of cycle , of course - people see caretaker as role of woman , and have discomfort or distrust of man , despite train and perform equally to women .
thus , men in position tend to get more suspicion or outright rejection from clients , and eventually have to find work somewhere else in order to make money to live from .

so then , even some of people who want to work in this job , might not actually be able to - and so continue cycle of overwork and understaff .
sometimes fair number of immigrants work in these places , too - wonder how much that change things , if some of these workers feel need to " settle " with home care job because stereotypes and racism make this easy to hold onto , while anything else hard to get . in that respect , there might be even perception this work is " below " status of white women , and further cycle will continue .

hard and dirty stuff just to get clean .

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

wish there was less kneejerk instinct to laugh about " silly " gadgets and products .
so many times , product is assistive device for particular kind of disabled person . someone with only one functional hand , someone with tremor , with weak grip , so on and so forth .

not everyone can live with others around to help always , and should not have to if only need help in specific areas .
likewise , not fair should have to wait for someone else to come around and do these things that would be easy with tools to accommodate . imagine just try to eat , but not have enough of ingredients ready after all , and can not ask anyone for help for 3 more days .

even if feel urge is just to laugh at how companies market these products , please keep purpose in mind and do not veer into laugh at " silly , lazy people " .

addendum as of september 13 2024 :

this is also very true for foods which come pre-cut and in package , like orange slices lay out on tray . of course would be very nice to not need so much plastic in these applications ! but remove without provide alternative is not worth starve out disabled people .

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
wish could have more adult fidget toys , and sure , know some really fancy pretty things out there . but what really mean by this is :
  • common fidget toys like pop its and chewables with prettier , more adult design choices - so can choose to not stand out so badly ,
  • fidget toys with better construction to fit adult proportions comfortably ,
  • fidget toys with better construction to withstand long term use ,
  • overall de-associate fidget as child only thing to which need divide age groups .

and sort of link to this :
not that disability aids need to be fashion accessories , but wonder how much more people would accept need aids if many more customisable . not just for kids , but adults too .

something kossai feel is ... well , people will stare because of this ... should at least be pretty thing , so that everything stand out and express together rather than " clash " .
some people can happily accept this clash and make as part of self image , yes .
but others only reluctantly accept this clash - not happy in own skin anymore , like part of that expression taken away .
and others deny clash so hard , that will not even use these important aids , and get hurt .

not think anyone is wrong for how feel about this clash ! expression is important - not everyone feel comfortable with same expressions .
in some part , yes , there is general fear of look disabled - but ... kossai do not fear this , yet still feel need for this expression . because , well , expression is in nature of many people , even ones who do not think so .

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

some disabled people will always need personal vehicles to get around .

some have equipment that public transport just physically can not account for and keep safe - know local mobility bus service have 8 typical seats and only 3 wheelchair spots , for example . wheelchairs big and need extra room for belts and clips to literally hold wheels down ! and that only , only account for wheelchairs , not for equipment like ventilators or hoists or anything else .

some people also have severe cognitive problems , and public transport overwhelm or otherwise in some way not safe , to self or to others . these people need for familiar driver with small car space that no one else ride in . these also may overlap with above category , people who have equipment even disabled specific public transport can not handle properly , and might need other specific accomodations that only personal vehicle can fully guarantee .

also something to think about , medical specialists . nice as might be , can not pack every single kind of medical specialist into every single little town . there will be travel times at some point , and not always as simple as doctor come here .
even more true with medical equipment for tests . mobility bus drivers who have school kids to drop off and take home can not necessarily give this kind of time for one person to see one doctor or have one test done , let alone multiple in single work day . yes , these specialists and equipment ought to be more common , but still can not be in every single place .

by all means world should have many less personal vehicles on road - this really would be safer for everyone . but , should not assume literally everyone can go without , and that public transport is solution for literally everyone . " literally everyone " will always have edge cases , where some people tick multiple at once no less , because life is messy like that .
so … remember disability too , please .

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

with accessibility in games , and especially here celeste , often see " hardcore " players say , need to find another game . but if that was all developer attitude - and be honest , in some ways is - then ... what games left to play ?
none ! none , because none would put thought in these features !

really . if kossai can not get through mario or sonic games , even most basic ones , what else is there ? something design for literal toddlers only , just because hands and brain on too much delay ?
that come with own problems : can not join in and relate with friends' game experiences , can not find much if any community because very niche to adult audiences , can not experience things like wonderful stories or sights because ... be honest ... no one would put effort in things like that if only audience could not appreciate . and even if challenge exist , at that point would still come from self , not from game .

challenge with games is not that can not think and puzzle through levels , or can not pull off tricky things at all , but need more time to do this . slow down , plot out , double check and easily correct inputs …
can see what need to do , but even in player friendly , basic games , can not make happen , and get stuck on levels that should be easy for hours .
games should give challenge , but that challenge still need be fun . not fun , and not worth time or money , if can only see 1/16th of game because something simple can completely stop progress .

some access features can make game easy at any time for anyone , need or not . cool , whatever , if use these features would ruin experience ... then just do not use . as for kossai , happy to play celeste at 50% speed , with dash assist and infinite stamina . these things do not ruin for kossai , these make possible . still not as if these make easy anyway , over 1000 deaths and still miss many secrets .
and , choose to not use infinite dash or invincibility , because feel that would take away from fun . but those can be useful for people too , both for access to allow participate when otherwise not possible , and for people to have fun with even if could do without .

so … really appreciate celeste have choices like these . can be very different experience to watch someone play something , and actually play for self .

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