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Entry tags:
struggle thoughts
in think about real time social groups , and why kossai struggle ...
things can move fast . really fast . already take kossai longer than anyone else to think of and write messages , even simple ones . this leave kossai with 2 choices .
first choice is to not push speed , to take as much time as necessary to formulate and word thoughts .
end result of this : everyone move on in conversation by time kossai can contribute , and have nothing more to say to contributions . in both real life scenarios and in games like vrchat , people can forget kossai was even there , and move on without even realise kossai get split off . so just feel like might as well not even be there , and ruin fun if stay .
second choice is to push speed , to say as much as possible , as quickly as possible - even if botch words , not explain well , or if answers very short .
end result of this : people punish kossai for social blunders , miscommunications , and lack of clarity that did not have time to think through - and also tend to assume short answers means not really care about conversations . but rarely do people even explain this much , just chalk this up to bad vibes or say idk just uncomfy without any explanation of why , or any grace and compassion for how these things only happen because literally force to rush , and remove from group .
in both cases also come across situations where kossai struggle more than usual - say for example , recent seizure , lack of sleep , etc - but still try really hard to participate , even if not fully coherent , and people laugh at kossai outright .
so , there is no win , and kossai give up on try those things . even struggle with non-group , non-real time things , but this is definitely where weakest , and where people give least kindness .
things can move fast . really fast . already take kossai longer than anyone else to think of and write messages , even simple ones . this leave kossai with 2 choices .
first choice is to not push speed , to take as much time as necessary to formulate and word thoughts .
end result of this : everyone move on in conversation by time kossai can contribute , and have nothing more to say to contributions . in both real life scenarios and in games like vrchat , people can forget kossai was even there , and move on without even realise kossai get split off . so just feel like might as well not even be there , and ruin fun if stay .
second choice is to push speed , to say as much as possible , as quickly as possible - even if botch words , not explain well , or if answers very short .
end result of this : people punish kossai for social blunders , miscommunications , and lack of clarity that did not have time to think through - and also tend to assume short answers means not really care about conversations . but rarely do people even explain this much , just chalk this up to bad vibes or say idk just uncomfy without any explanation of why , or any grace and compassion for how these things only happen because literally force to rush , and remove from group .
in both cases also come across situations where kossai struggle more than usual - say for example , recent seizure , lack of sleep , etc - but still try really hard to participate , even if not fully coherent , and people laugh at kossai outright .
so , there is no win , and kossai give up on try those things . even struggle with non-group , non-real time things , but this is definitely where weakest , and where people give least kindness .