ego inflation humour
Jul. 15th, 2025 10:23 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kossaiin teen years , kossai was more unstable and depressive , for various reasons . like plenty of other people , try to cope through humour - self-hate type of humour especially . but as people say , well , that just kind of prime brain to continue self-hate , especially when actually fuck something up .
hard to say there was really any one awakening for how kossai want to change attitudes , think was kind of just lucky to stumble on kindnesses and be in any shape to internalise those . and so ... start to shift . less about creative ways to hate and degrade , and more about totally inflate ego for kicks . like eighth wonder of world here , hello !
do kossai still have sometimes apparently-disproportionate reactions to mistakes and frustrations ? yeah . but generally much less fuel by self hate now , and more about root of problem - something that need to kick and scream about in moment , like threads that knot up and tangle mid-project , then cool down and reevaluate . and if mistake is something that will not be important by tomorrow ? can just laugh and brush off .
know these things not easy overnight fixes , especially if start off in worse position than kossai , but yeah , do think helpful .
hard to say there was really any one awakening for how kossai want to change attitudes , think was kind of just lucky to stumble on kindnesses and be in any shape to internalise those . and so ... start to shift . less about creative ways to hate and degrade , and more about totally inflate ego for kicks . like eighth wonder of world here , hello !
do kossai still have sometimes apparently-disproportionate reactions to mistakes and frustrations ? yeah . but generally much less fuel by self hate now , and more about root of problem - something that need to kick and scream about in moment , like threads that knot up and tangle mid-project , then cool down and reevaluate . and if mistake is something that will not be important by tomorrow ? can just laugh and brush off .
know these things not easy overnight fixes , especially if start off in worse position than kossai , but yeah , do think helpful .
