kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

so one thing that marie kondo say is , sometimes will buy object or get as gift , and feel happy about thought of use - but then , dislike in practise .
maybe clothes do not fit right , or gadget is more hassle than help , whatever . and people can feel guilty about this , because that was good money , good thought and intention ! and object really is perfectly fine , for ... anyone else but self .

in those cases , purpose of object in personal life is to teach these very preferences . can then hold gratitude for object as teacher , and pass to someone who might get better physical use .

think creative projects can be very similar .
maybe , sometimes , purpose of project is not to push through struggle , polish to full and release . maybe purpose is to be there with half finish - to teach preferences of what want to create , and more directly , teach experience of this medium . to serve as well of ideas for another time , or glimpse back into past . maybe even , to share with others that might see whole new spark and give project new life .

maybe some day will come back to these things and finish . but maybe will not - and that is not just OK , but sometimes true purpose .

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)

do get sad when people post art with captions that just ... self hate . this sucks , terrible artist , sorry to waste time , things like that .

with captions like that , at best , will get answers that feel more like pity than true interest , because people want to be nice and reassure - especially when do enjoy !
and at worst , people will choose not to answer or share because cruel to self - even if really do enjoy - because cruelty make people feel bad , even if not target .

and … some people compare selves to others , especially when start out ... to see someone with more skill and experience declare self horrible and incompetent can really hurt . self hate is not humility , and to voice self hate can hurt others , as well as set self in cycle to just continue . if always feel bad about art , likely will not see and get to appreciate even when improve .

no … self hate for art do not help . not one magic formula to stop self hate happen at all , but at least , can try to voice that hate less . look for good details in own work , admire that put heart out there , admire that art is different from others . be proud when express what want to express , even - or especially - if result is " technically incompetent " .

kossai wish keep more of childhood and teenage art . at 16 delete many old bad pieces , because whatever , right ? but … now miss those things , wish could look back . that art was unique , and expressive , and sometimes just plain silly .
so … be gentle on self as artist . keep records , find good things , voice that angry self hate less .

edit : also maybe humility sucks anyways . loudly shout " this fucks " over meaningless scribbles . live life . >:)

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